I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
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