only you would photoshop your dick
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
