Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
kristin has been a bad kristin
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Randomize
