I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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