Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize