did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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