i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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