My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
i came on her dog
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
