I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
