i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
