Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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