OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I could make wine with my vomit
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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