So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
