weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
