We're facebook friends in real life
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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