You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
