i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
