rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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