i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize