Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize