So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
