Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize