Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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