So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
