Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize
