I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
