WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
They have beer where we have blood.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
