i just wanna soil my oats bro
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
