Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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