Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
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