Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
