Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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