We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
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