you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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