whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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