going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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