he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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