His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Randomize
