but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
