how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
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