my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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