The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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