I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
