So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
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