She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
