I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
