Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
