Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
