South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
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