I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
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