found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize
